The Blog of Funny Names

As if being named William Van Winkle Wolf wasn’t bad enough, imagine being saddled with the nickname “Chicken.” Chicken Wolf (1862-1903) was a Major League Baseball outfielder. Although his career wasn’t spectacular, it was definitely solid, as Chicken amassed 1439 hits over an 11-year career. He also led the American Association in batting average in 1890.

But far more interesting is Chicken’s personal life. Chicken apparently got his nickname after his manager told his team to eat lightly before a game, but Wolf disobeyed and scarfed down a heaping helping of stewed chicken. He played poorly that game, committing several errors, and for that, he will forever be known in baseball lore as Chicken Wolf. However, this sad event has had beneficial effects on numerous generations. You see, Little Leaguers around the world now know not to eat stewed chicken before a game. Way to show those kiddos, Chicken.

It is unknown how Chicken felt about this nickname, but it sure does make one wonder if he was more likely than the average player to fowl a ball off. (Haha, fowl, not foul? Get it?) Horrible jokes aside, you’ll be fascinated to know that about halfway through his career he also came to be known as “Jimmy” Wolf. Because Bill Wolf was apparently not cool enough for Chicken. Or something.

Chicken doing what he does best.

A generally quiet individual, Chicken ruffled the feathers of team captain Dude Esterbrook during one memorable argument. Dude began the Louisville Colonels’ 1889 season (in which the team would finish with a near-all-time-worst record of 27-111) as team captain. Dude was a bit of a control freak and liked things done his way, even assessing fines to teammates who did not follow his direction. In April, Esterbrook fined a player 10 dollars (10 whole dollars!) for not following his instructions on how to throw a ball. This apparently incensed Chicken, who engaged in a heated argument with Dude over the fine. Esterbrook then slapped a 10 dollar fine on Chicken. This fine escalated all the way to an incredible 40 dollars. Wolf responded to Dude’s deed by visiting the team owner. The result? Chicken supplanted Dude as team captain within a week.

In other exciting news, Chicken apparently battled a bit of a weight problem at one point, with newspapers commenting in the spring of 1890 that “Wolf is in good condition and has worked off nearly all superfluous flesh.”

And for that, he should be commended. You go, Chicken Wolf!

Urban James Shocker (1890-1928), born Urbain Jacques Shockor, was a pitcher for the Yankees and St. Louis Browns. He was one hell of a pitcher too. Finishing his career with a 187-117 record with a 3.17 ERA, the electrifying right-hander hurled four straight 20-win seasons in the 1920s, a remarkable feat.

However, perhaps his greatest claim to fame (aside from his fantastic name) is that he was the last Yankee pitcher to legally throw a spitball. A dangerous pitch, the spitter was outlawed in 1920, but seventeen pitchers were grandfathered in and allowed to throw the spitter until they retired. Shocker was one of these men. Burleigh Arland “Ol’ Stubblebeard” Grimes was another. In fact, Ol’ Stubblebeard was the last spitballer to retire, which he did in 1934.

Urban Shocker was apparently a fan of warm coats.

Shortly after being released by the Yankees in 1928, Shocker entered a baseball tournament in Denver. He pitched in one game on August 6 and caught pneumonia soon after. Unfortunately, the illness, combined with heart disease, would kill him the next month.

But you gotta give Shocker credit for his awesome pitching career, as well as for the fact that he undoubtedly lived up to his name. Living in an era in which a large percentage of the population still lived in rural areas, Shocker was indeed an Urban kind of guy. You see, Urban was born in Cleveland and died in Denver.

Shocking, isn’t it?

Eppa “Jephtha” Rixey (1891-1963) didn’t want to be a pro ballplayer. Like most people who don’t want to be pro ballplayers, he ended up in baseball’s Hall of Fame.

Eppa’s story is an interesting one. While playing ball at the University of Virginia, Jephtha was spotted by umpire Cy Rigler, who tried to get Rixey to sign with the Phillies. Rixey declined, saying he wanted to be a chemist, but Rigler insisted, and Rixey eventually accepted the deal. The National League created a rule prohibiting umpires from signing players. But who cares – Jephtha was in the door.

Eppa looks like a man stoked on life!

Rixey, whose uncles were John Franklin Rixey, a congressman, and Presley Marion Rixey, Surgeon General of the US Navy, proceeded to amass the most wins for any left-handed pitcher at the time of his retirement. Rixey finished his career with a 266-251 record and a 3.15 ERA. Rixey was a tough competitor on the field (and was known for destroying locker rooms or disappearing for a few days after a loss), but an amiable Southern gentleman off of it. Fun fact – he was once traded two guys by the names of Jimmy Ring and Greasy Neale. The only time a Jephtha was ever traded for a Greasy, to my knowledge.

For those of you who are curious, the nickname Jephtha was apparently created by Cincinnati sportswriter Bill Phelon. Although I have no idea why. In a somewhat odd observation, Eppa commented that the nickname “sounds like a cross between a Greek letter fraternity and a college yell.”

Although Eppa’s record wasn’t that stellar (he holds the Major League record for losses by a left-hander), the Veteran’s Committee voted to elect Jephtha to the Hall of Fame in 1963. Upon his election, he quipped, “they’re really scraping the bottom of the barrel, aren’t they?”

You go, Eppa Rixey!

The no-hitter is one of baseball’s rarer feats. Since the first no-hitter was thrown in the 1870’s, there have only been 278 more – or an average of about 2 per year. No-hitters are often thrown by great pitchers, and in fact, even some of baseball’s all-time greats have gone their entire career without throwing the much-heralded no-no.

But we’re not here to celebrate greatness. We’re here for funny names. And it turns out that two of baseball’s most improbable no-hitters were thrown by two great named guys – Bobo Holloman and Bumpus Jones.

The man, the myth – Bumpus Jones. (Credit: sabr.org)

Charles Leander “Bumpus” Jones was not a very good pitcher. However, despite having a career that spanned all of eight games, Bumpus hurled a no-hitter in his first major league appearance! Unbelievable. That incredible no-no awesomeness is matched only by Johnny Vander Meer’s insane feat of pitching no-hitters in back-to-back starts! But back to Bumpus. On October 15, 1892, the last day of the season, Bumpus bested the Cincinnati Reds, 7-1 (the one run scored on an error), giving up four walks. The next season, he appeared in seven games, going 1-4 with a 10.19 ERA. He would never pitch in the Majors again. He finished his short career with a 2-4 record, a 7.99 ERA, and 10 strikeouts.

Which brings us to Alva Lee “Bobo” Holloman. In terms of no-hitter awesomeness, Bobo is a complete and utter slacker compared to Bumpus. Bobo didn’t throw a no-no in his first Major League appearance. It took him until his second appearance – but first start – to get his no-no, beating the Philadelphia A’s on May 6, 1953. Like Bumpus, Bobo didn’t do much after that, pitching only 20 more games, compiling a career record of 3-7 with a 5.23 ERA and 25 strikeouts in his three-month career.

And there you have it – Bumpus and Bobo. Baseball’s most unlikely no-nos.