Hello all Funny Names in the News hunters! Lots to go through this week so buckle up if you have buckles nearby and let’s get started.
Our Texan Baby Correspondent Fannie Cranium brings us news from Houston, where local residents Tressa and Manuel Montalvo, Jr. had a rather happy Valentine’s Day. Happy because Tressa managed to deliver two sets of identical twins in the same day. This makes us happy too because they named the children Ace, Blane, Cash, and Dylan. Fox News, who reported the story here, state that the odds of this occurring are about 1 in 70 million. Given the current U.S. population, this leads me to speculate that there should be about 5 such double-pairs of identical twins in the country. If you’re one of them (or a quarter of them, I suppose), let us know below the line!
From that rather unlikely-to-succeed call for audience participation we move on to the world of commercials, where our intrepid Retired Basketball Player Activity Correspondent Dave brings us the news that the great Dikembe Mutombo Mpolondo Mukamba Jean-Jacques Wamutombo, also known as Dikembe Mutombo, previously profiled on our blog here, has appeared in a new Geico commercial. If you enjoy insurance company ads where former basketball stars act strangely, you’ll love it.
Dave also doubles as our resident boxing expert, and tells us that “Cornelius K-9 Bundrage and Bronco McKart become the second and third guys to land multiple FNITN mentions, as they fight against Ishe Smith and J’Leon Love, respectively, in a Showtime-televised fight card at the awesomely-named Masonic Temple Theater in Detroit.” So that’s good. So good I just copy-pasted what he wrote for me right into this here article.
In Arto learns stuff news, there’s a comedian named Tig Notaro, and (s)he’s performing on the St. Paul, MN- based radio show Wits with Funny Names Blog favorite Kathleen Edwards on April 19th. Should be a good show. And yes, I really do do (thee-hee) so much research that I don’t actually know if Tig is a man or a woman. Call me dumb below the line! (We like comments).
Next up we have this week’s fix from our Broadway Correspondent Amb, who lets us know that our impressive trend of boosting careers with our posts continues – Zosia Mamet has received excellent reviews for her performance in the new play “Really Really“, which is “otherwise unsurprising” according to this Vulture review. The play also stars Lauren Culpepper.
Amb is also our Showbiz Info Maestro, and reminds us that this Sunday it’s again time for the Academy Awards. Funny named-actresses Quvenzahé Wallis and Emmanuelle Riva have already made history by managing to be the youngest and oldest Best Actress nominees ever, and could, logically enough, also become the youngest/oldest winners in that category. Good luck to both of them.
More funny movie names will feature at the Independent Spirit Awards the night before, where nominees include Jason Yee Tippet, Lol Crawley, who must laugh every time she signs something, Emayatzy Corianeldo, Ginger Sledge, Dete Meserve and Besedka Johnson. We hope they all win. Especially Ginger Sledge. Gotta love Hollywood names, man.
Finally, Dave encourages us all to read this article about a man named Taitex Phlamachha. Really, if that name isn’t enough to pique your interest, I don’t know what will. It’s funny too, so give it a stab. And then try to say Phlamachha ten times in a row. Don’t face anyone as you do so though, as they may not appreciate all the projectile spit. Just a tip.
Thanks for reading this far, those of you who did. Now ya’ll go and have too many babies to handle, as it’s the thing to do this year.