Bow wow wow yippee yo yippee yay folks! It’s time for another corybantic installment of Funny Names in the News. You see, I just got back from wrapping a six or seven hour filming session with Arto for my upcoming Kickstarter campaign, and it’s 2:30 here on the west coast. I have a busy day tomorrow, with business calls, longer-than-usual tutoring appointments, and a classy evening banquet, so let’s get this boat rolling. (I’m a fan of the mixed metaphor).
Mike McFail slipping a punch by Jimmy Lange.
Somehow our boxing correspondent Dave (aka Yours Truly) got caught in a recursive loop of looking at boxers with losing records the other day, and I came upon some doozies. There’s the aptly-named Mike McFail, who appears to have retired in 2011 after going winless in his last 19 matches. Ouch! But you always have to respect a fighter who goes out there and puts it all on the line.
I also stumbled upon one Leviticus Long, who went 0-5 in his short-lived career, with his first loss coming to future world champ Vivian Harris, and his next four bouts being used to pad the record of Joshua Smith, who started his career off impressively with an 11-0 record against fighters with losing records, then went on his own losing streak, eventually retiring with a 17-37 record in 2007. Still, ya gotta give these guys credit. They have more professional fights than most people do, and that takes some talent and a lot of courage.
We’re pleased to welcome back a Funny Names Blog favorite who simply didn’t get enough coverage the first time around – Carly Rae Jepsen made headlines this week, but probably not for the right reasons, as she was singled out for throwing what some people called the worst pitch ever. Poor Carly, but we’re still glad to have her write catchy pop songs, so I guess it’s good she’s not considering a sporting-related career change.
In Strange Bedfellows news, we learned that Nasir Jones a.k.a. rapper Nas, has teamed up with Harvard University, who gave him the honor of naming their Hip Hop Fellowship program the Nasir Jones Hip Hop Fellowship Program. This complements their Hip Hop Archive program and shatters everyone’s perception of the kind of things you can do at Harvard.
Sorry Amb, I can’t. I’ve been instructed not to.
Our lovely Low Budget Sci Fi Films with Portmanteau Titles Correspondent Amb brings us delightful news on that front:
So the SyFy network (Space here in Canada) has this new strategy of airing super low budget, so-awful-they’re-amazing-but-mostly-just-awful movies in the summer. Last week it was “Sharknado” (sharks + tornado) and this week is, wait for it, “Sharktopus” (it’s a shark … with octopus tentacles). Please, someone, say something funny about this!
Also, Amb brings us some other exciting news from the showbiz front:
There’s a new documentary about Calvin and Hobbes that looks amazing! Aside from the fact that Hobbes is one of my favourite fictional characters EVER, I’m pleased to say that this film won something called “The Golden Badger Award” at a film festival. In Wisconsin.
Wisconsin, eh? Isn’t that close to where Liz lives? Maybe when we win a Golden Badger Award for our writing, she can pick it up for us!
Until next week folks, this has been Funny Names in the News – all the news that’s fit to flabbergast. Catch y’all on the flip side and enjoy your weekend!
The Blog of Funny Names 
Swooning over your use of “corybantic” “recursive loop” and “portmanteau” in the same post. Nicely done, babe. Have fun tonight – stay classy, San Diego! 😉
Totally noticed those Amb-isms! Love it! I had to scroll back up to answer a little question in my head, ‘now who wrote this post today?” 🙂 Nicely done!
Haha, aside from corybantic, I’d call those Dave-isms, but I’m glad to share the spotlight 🙂
I saw corybantic and well, from there, I just rolled it all together. Mea culpa…but yes, the spotlight casts a wide shine!
It’s true. I use “recursive loop” all the time now, and I totally picked that one up from Dave. It probably started with talking about Community, as so many good things do … I actually think I first heard “portmanteau” from my friend Princess over at chagrinnamontoast.wordpress.com. You’d love her, Bon!
Sharknado and Sharktopus. I think I just died and went to heave(n). Talk about inspired. *Fannie coughs behind her hand.*
Maybe they qualify for the Bulwer-Lytton Contest…http://bulwer-lytton.com/
Great post Dave.
That (n) you put there was truly inspired! 🙂
Thanks Dave, sometimes I just can’t help myself…
Fannie!!! Where has this contest been all my life?!? Thank you times a million for the introduction. I’m going to have so much fun with this.
I love this: “The official deadline is April 15 (a date that Americans associate with painful submissions and making up bad stories). The actual deadline is June 30.”
I love this contest. I’ve been following it for years. I just haven’t come up with a truly “great” line to enter yet.
Don’t you just love the prize? And you get your name in the paper. lol…
I so want to enter!
Me too!!! 😀
It seems like one of the keys to winning is making a high-falutin’ attempt to use some brilliant metaphor or simile, but getting carried away with the labored metaphor and then finishing the sentence as kind of an afterthought. Seems like a fun challenge.
Ooooh, maybe we have a BoFN team challenge coming up…food for thought. 🙂
you’re funny, Fannie. very very funny. Probably because of all the Eddie Izzard clips you watch. 🙂 and p.s. did you say “food”?
OMG Liz-you crack me up. I’m certain I said, thought or longed for food multiple times a day. 🙂
I do not mind that you mock my neighboring state of Wisconsin over its coveted Golden Badger Award, but I assure you that any Wisconsin folk reading this and feeling as if you’re making even the slightest bit of fun at them will come round to badger you right back.
haha–have never heard of this award, but it sounds like great fun and has been given to a deserving winner. If you really want to make fun of Wisconsin folk (which I know was not your intent), you should ask them why they wear those silly cheese hats at their football games. Never understood that. Why make fun of yourself for living in a state that produces amazing cheese? (am setting this up for you, Dave, so you can deliver some of those deliciously salty cheese puns again–pretty please? 😉 )
amb: Last week it was “Sharknado” (sharks + tornado) and this week is, wait for it, “Sharktopus” (it’s a shark … with octopus tentacles). Please, someone, say something funny about this!”
The sequel is going to be “Sharktomom.”
But I don’t know if it will be funny or not.
It will.