Good morning, sports fans!
I’m pinch hitting for Mark today, since his schedule has been packed with away games lately and he’s been on the road with his team. His next home game will be a week from today.
Ok. That’s it. I’m out of baseball analogies. Let’s face it, we all know the only thing I bat around here is my eyelashes. (Hi, Dave).
Getting back to a game that I actually know how to play, today I’m very excited to bring you a brand-new Funny Name Theory!
The Middle Name Acting Aphorism
If you’re involved in show business, then there is a direct, positive correlation between the level of excellence* you will achieve in your career and the number of middle names that you have.
* the term “excellence” is totally subjective and the definition of such term will vary depending largely on the amount of caffeine certain funny names bloggers may or may not have consumed. Case studies: Asa Maxwell Thorton Farr Butterfield, Henry William Dagliesh Cavill
**The Middle Name Acting Aphorism Addendum**
If you’re involved in show business, have multiple middle names and a last name that’s longer than all of your first names combined, then Amb would like to marry you. Please. (Provided that a schedule can be worked out with Dave, of course). Evidence: George Mark Paul Stroumboulopoulos