So apparently someone decided that traveling halfway around the world with his wife was more important than keeping up on his FNITN duties. Tsk tsk!

Arto’s in Finland right now and I’m housesitting for him and his cats. His cats are named Jackson Miff Ukejaakkola and Pepper NotJules Ukejaakkola. Are those funny names? Maybe the last name is the funniest name of all. Playing scrabble in Finland must be really weird.

It’s 2:48 in the morning. What can I write about funny names in the news? Well here’s a poem I wrote when I created this draft earlier today.

Arto, Arto,

Thinks he’s so smarto,

But this draft I have to starto,

If he doesn’t do his parto.

– Love Dave

But we’re here to talk about important stuff. Extremely important stuff. Funny Names in Sports Where You Swing Stuff correspondent Marvelous Mark Sackler brought to my attention the name Keridach Aphibarnrat and was eager to inject some Aphibarnrat magic it into this week’s FNITN as soon as the draft was opened. But apparently some monster decided not to create the draft.

What kind of monster? Well, nobody who has seen it has lived to tell about it, but rumor has it that it’s tall

and skinny,

and dresses like a time traveler trapped in five different decades at once,

and only has three friends in the world:

a little blond girl,

a zombie,

and a statue or something.

Actually, it kind of looks like…

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Even though the monster is caged, I still don’t feel safe.

Alright, that’s it folks, I’ve got nothing. Enjoy your Friday!

P.S. and feel free to play a fun little game in the comments where you decide what prefix goes best before Arto. Some of my ideas are Popt-, Ret-, Magnac-, Ricky Ric-

Cheerio,

Dave