“Who’s on first.”–Bud Abbott
“Opera in English makes about as much sense as baseball in Italian”–H.L. Mencken
A common ongoing discussion, in baseball, involves the comparison of the players of one era with those of another. Who was better? Is there really a difference? Can you make a comparison based on statistics alone? Here at The Blog of Funny Names, we have a two word answer for these questions.
What matters here is, who has the edge in funny names? This is not so easily answered. We’ve profiled many of the great baseball funny names from the past and a few from the present, but nowhere can you find more funny baseball names in one place than the annul Minor League Baseball Moniker Madness, now coming into its final days on the MiLB.com web site. A selection of 75 wild and crazy names are up for this year’s award and you can vote and see the leader board here. We won’t attempt to answer the question as to which era of baseball has better names, at least not now. But we will poll you, our readers, as to whom you think should emerge victorious in Moniker Madness.
Below is a brief bit on each of the top six in the rankings, as of 6 PM EDT Monday, August 26. It is followed by a poll for you to pick which of the six you like best. We’ll endeavor to provide both results in FNITN on Friday and see how our readers opinions stack up vs. the fans on MiLB.com. A favorite game of mine is to speculate who I think these names would be, if I didn’t know they were baseball players.
Current Standings as of 6 PM EDT, Monday, August 26:
1. Sicnarf Loopstok. Who he is: a first-year pro, second-string catcher hitting .180 in short season A ball. It might be a short career, so he needs to win this one now. Who I think the name would be: Prime minister of Bosnia and Herzegovina (as it turns out, he is from Aruba, so maybe the governor of Aruba).
2. Stryker Trahan. Who he is: a second-year pitcher in the Arizona Diamondbacks organization. Who I think the name would be: A guy who got kicked off the Australian national rugby team for assaulting an official.
3. Giuseppe Pappacio Who he is: Rookie shortstop, 18th round pick by the Cubs in this year’s amateur draft. He was promoted to A ball from Rookie League after just 9 games. Who I think the name would be: A second-string tenor for the Metropolitan Opera. (See H.L. Mencken quote above)
4. Storm Throne: Who he is: the highest ranked pitcher in the current standings, he’s a second year player in the White Sox organization. Who I think the name would be: A female porn star.
5. Forrest Snow: Who he is: a 24-year-old pitcher in AAA ball in the Seattle Mariners organization. Might see him in the show, yet. Who I think the name would be: A character on Game of Thrones.
6. Jose Jose: Who he is: A 23-year-old pitcher in the Arizona Diamondbacks system–that makes two of the top six for the snakes, so they take the team honors hands down. Who I think the name would be: a character in comedy sketch on Saturday Night Live or other TV variety show. (Can’t you just hear Bill Dana saying, “My name, Jose Jose!?”)