Wow! America turns 45, Matt Dumba wears 55, a Windell Send-Off and a Dikembe Mutombo Hall of Fame Celebration – It’s Funny Names in the News 101!

Happy Friday, one and all! I hope your days are all off to a delightful start. Dave-o here! Back from a wild bachelor party weekend in Cabo San Lucas, and ready to hit y’all with a blast of Funny Names In The News fun!

So much Funny Names in the News this week (partly due to us dedicating a special edition to our 100th FNITN recently!) that I’m going to have to do this in “bullet point and snarky remark” form!

Is someone allowed to be a smartass and a Dumba55 at the same time?

Is someone allowed to be a smartass and a Dumba55 at the same time?

We start off with a delightful piece of hockey news brought to you by stick-waving correspondent Arto(wizard), who informs us that Matt Dumba of the Minnesota Wild (Hi Liz!!!!!!) wears jersey number 55, so his jersey says Dumba55! Sounds like a smart choice to me!

From the ice rink to another use for arenas – megachurches – minister Creflo Augustus Dollar, known to many as a successful prosperity minister, got some PR recently for requesting a $60 million jet from his congregants. It also drew some pushback from taxpayer advocates! Some people say an abuse of power and tax-exempt status… I say NOMINATIVE DETERMINISM! (Even if people say Creflo “Dollar” isn’t pronounced like the currency).

In news about bands named after countries, but that aren’t country bands, an unknown BoFN correspondent  (I did some digging and found it was our favorite fiery Finn, Arto!)  informs us that Dewey Bunnell was one of the founders of the band America (remember “Horse with No Name” and “I Need You”?). The interesting news is that America turns 45 this year. That’s some serious longevity!!

We miss you Windell! Hope you're living the High Life up in Heaven!

We miss you Windell! Hope you’re living the High Life up in Heaven!

Moving from civics to anatomy class, newscaster Natarsha Belling caused quite a stir recently with her oddly-shaped neckline. It’s actually not all that odd… a common shape, just not so common for a neckline. I’ll leave it to y’all to snicker about the outfit’s unusual feature.

On to some sadder news… BoFN favorite Windell Middlebrooks, whom we profiled back in the day, passed away at age 36 a few weeks ago. You may remember him as the Miller High Life guy, or from his appearances in various TV shows like Scrubs, Cougar Town, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Parks and Recreation, or many others. He’s been in a lot of shows, and will be greatly missed, but the High Life lives on!

Dikembe agrees and says No No No, that's not how to end a FNITN!

Dikembe Mutombo agrees and says No No No, that’s not how to end a FNITN!

Windell wouldn’t want us to end this post on a somber note, and neither does our person, so we bring you some celebratory news featuring another BoFN mainstay. Dikembe Mutombo Mplondo Mukamba Jean-Jacques Wamutombo (known to the uninitiated as simply Dikembe Mutombo), was recently announced as an inductee into the basketball Hall of Fame! Dikembe decided to take a break from saving the world – seriously, that was such a ridiculously fun little web-based game from the time when weird people thought the world would end in 2012 – and join WNBA legend Lisa Leslie and another 9 folks in the Naismith Hall. Congrats Dikembe!

That just about does it for this week’s FNITN – join us next week when we cover all sorts of other Funny Names in the News that got squeezed out of this jam-packed edition!

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About Dave

Based out of San Diego, California. Co-founder of the Blog of Funny Names. funnynamesblog.wordpress.com
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12 Responses to Wow! America turns 45, Matt Dumba wears 55, a Windell Send-Off and a Dikembe Mutombo Hall of Fame Celebration – It’s Funny Names in the News 101!

  1. kerbey says:

    “You can do MAGIC!” That’s a line from an America song, but not my favorite. My favorite is Sister Golden Hair, which is also a bad name for a sister. Nearly as weird as Sister Christian, but that’s another topic. Being named Dewey would be hard; you’d either be a decimal system or the fella who got clobbered by Truman. And I don’t mean the Japanese. Oh, and as to Natarsha. WHY IS THE R THERE? Let’s just say I knew a girl whose named rhymed with Natasha and when people put the “r” in there, it drove her bonkers, and made them look like a Dumba55. Did she really not notice that when she wore it? The black tip??

    And as to Creflo, which you’re supposed to pronounce as Creh-flo, methinks he needs to read a little more about humility. 60 million dollars could feed a lot of people–do a lot of cleft palate surgeries, clothe the homeless. Creflo, please.

    • Dave says:

      I think Sister Golden Hair is a beautiful name for a sister! This is the Blog of Funny Names after all!

      WHY IS THE R THERE? That’s what I’ve been wondering too. Was your friend named Sarsha by any chance?

      • kerbey says:

        I am not at liberty to say, bless her heart. Do you suppose it would be fine for a fellow to be called Brother Golden Hair? Or Father Thinning Hair? Or Mother-in-Law Poodle Dog Hair–because that one is accurate.

  2. ksbeth says:

    love the jersey and by the time i would learn to pronounce and memorize dikembe’s full name, the world will have truly ended.

  3. Arto says:

    Dumba55 makin’ it to the blog! Gotta love the guy. His teammates have good nicknames as well, including but not limited to El Kapitan, El Nino, Easy Parise, Sutes, Granny Smith, Chris “Track Star” Stewart, Splurgin Spurgeon, “My Name is Jonas” Brodin, Holla at Haula, Doooooob and Pomegranate. Unofficially.

  4. I’m left rather speechless after the neckline story. Zoiks.

  5. xmatman says:

    Following this blog is gonna be fun!

  6. Dumba55 – my sister in is Minneapolis. I shall suggest she becomes a Wild fan, if only to get such an amusing jersey!

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