Funny Names in the News vol. 116 with Rainy Dingle and Tasty Lasagna

Happy Friday! It’s time again to go over the newspapers again and dig out the week’s very best names.

First, we pop over to Italy, where a big soccer match between Inter Milan and Carpi had a dramatic ending. Inter was 1-0 ahead in the last minute, when Carpi’s tasty striker Kevin Lasagna decided the time was ripe for an equalizer. headlined the event “Inter choke on Lasagna”, which is pretty good.

Italy's top scorer, earlier.

Italy’s top scorer, earlier.

In country music news this week, fans of Brantley Gilbert are going to have to wait just a bit longer for his new album. I don’t think I’ve yet heard one of his tunes, but I like the sound of the name. Always good to see a rare “last name as first name, and first name as last name” combo.

In icier sports, the NHL All Star Game is taking place this weekend at the birthplace of hockey – Nashville, Tennessee. The roster for the event includes Blog of Funny Names favorites Dustin Byfuglien and Devan “the Dube” Dubnyk. Unfortunately most of our favorite names did not make it this time around, but there’s always next year, Clayton Stoner!

Less funnily named, but delighting the crowd at the game are also the winner of the fan vote, and probably the league’s worst player John Scott, half-bear half-man hybrid Brent Burns, seen here playing with a baby penguin, and our newest friend, the Russian sniper Evgeny Kuznetsov, who played his way into our hearts with this quote about his daily routine :

“I just want to play hockey, come home. Watch the Family Feud, go to bed. Wake up, play hockey again.”

That’s my kind of routine.

Brent Burns has the best hair in the world.

Back to soccer, where England’s Sunderland AFC celebrated their youth academy graduates this week, including one Jonjo Dickman. Young Dickman only played for the club once before moving onto other teams, but he is fondly remembered on their website at least.


Meanwhile in Ireland, bad weather is making the news. Very high winds caused huge waves to hit shore in the Dingle Peninsula, which for obvious reasons is our very favorite peninsula. You can see some of the footage of very angry water here.

Thanks for reading, this has been this week’s update on Funny Names in the News! Check back next week for more fun business!

About Arto

Co-founder of the Funny Names Blog, Hawaiian shirt enthusiast, and holder of a funny name himself with too many vowels for any sensible person. Currently residing in San Diego, California, scouring through obscure documents on a hunt for more funny names.
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13 Responses to Funny Names in the News vol. 116 with Rainy Dingle and Tasty Lasagna

  1. Dave says:

    No TJ Oshie or Cal Clutterbuck in the NHL All Star game?!? What’s up with that????

  2. Dave says:

    Jonjo Dickman!!!! What a name!!!

  3. Mark Sackler says:

    Unfortunately, I saw it too late to submit, but somebody at the Australian Open tweeted that Madison Keys and Jack Sock would make a great mixed doubles team. “Keys and Sock” could be called The Lost Items team.

  4. wdydfae says:

    “. . . I always liked my mom’s Lasagna best, but Arto’s got me reconsidering with his latest splendiferous FNitN . . .”

    “. . . Jonjo was a man who thought he was a loner . . . that is, until Arto enlisted him into his newest FNitN forray . . .”

    “. . . like the Tambourine Man, Arto’s plays that FNitN post like the Dingle jangle crashing of the Irish waves . . .”

    “. . . ranging across sports, music, weather and geography, Arto breaks new barriers . . . and a coupla front teeth . . .”

    • Arto says:

      Mmmm, mom’s lasagna. Making me hungry.

      My mind was playing a trick on me, so I had to check if the actual lyric was Jonjo. I think it should be. I’ll submit a request for correction to Paul.

      To one day experience a Dingle jangle morning is my dream.

  5. ksbeth says:

    evgeny is a prodigy. he needs to start a following.

  6. kerbey says:

    I actually know who Brantley Gilbert is: a DB singer who wears a wifebeater in his “Bottoms Up” video, those trendy tribal total-earlobe earrings, too many jewelry accessories and attention whore tats. Kind of like the tats on the sleeve Brent Burns has, minus the adorable balance of kids and penguins. Burns looks like Encino Man from some Paleolithic era. I fear he’ll grab me by the hair and drag me into his cave.

    This is fun to say: Evgeny Kuznetsov. So many sharp letters. He should come to my house. We literally watch no less than 2-3 hrs of Family Feud per day. My son is nuts about it. I feel like I could win Fast Money against any family from either coast or upper Appalachia.

    And Dingle? Brilliant.

    • Arto says:

      Burns is the friendliest caveman in the west. You can tell from his interaction with the penguin. And that hockey player smile.

      Kuznetsov might enjoy coming over. Nothing like a bit of the Family Feud help you relax. Just ask Dave, he can name every host off the top of his head in about 9 seconds.

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